A Breath Of Fresh Air

It's been awhile.

Sat, 03 Dec 2005 18:00:55 GMT

Updation:
Life is swell, I suppose.
School is stressing me outtt.
Life is hard to live some of the time, most of the time.
I am sick..I have been Forever. (more like three weeks)
I feel like I have to keep on trying to find myself.
That everyday I question who I am.
And if I'm 100% positive I am satisfied with that.
Which I usually am not. Blahh.
Rent was amazing, but not as good as the play.
(nothing ever will be :-))

Does anyone have any suggestions on how to get rid of a
three-week-old headache that will not Go Away!
.. comment if you do. Much Thanks.

Well, it is Saturday. The day of Procrastination! YAY!
When I shall accomplish nothing and be A.O.K. with it.

When in Rome, Do as the Romans do.
--terAisA.

Updation. I suppose.

Wed, 09 Nov 2005 01:15:47 GMT

Yo. This week is swaheet, ONLY because its four days long. yay. I'm joining crew for the district play tomorrow.. :-D yay Drama! (not like emo drama.. like acting drama) speaking of emo.. ha. I must go to Joe Bean soooon and who ever wants to come with, leave the date and time and it shall be f-u-n. "I'm doing swell" you could say. LIT party on SUNDAY. I'm pumped. LOVE THEM. -hmmm, oh Benefit Concert on Saturday 19th, Thomas Gym. Go and rock out to some sweet bands. Doors open at 6:30. I will be there! and you will be square if you do not show. procrastination of AP homework... yay!

I LOVE RENT
(its a play for all of you who have not yet experienced LIFE)

My weekend should be H-O-T-T, I think.

11-23= RENT :-D
-End.

Wow, Thrid Day IN a ROW.

Tue, 01 Nov 2005 22:12:08 GMT

Updation:

Tuesday was a pretty sucky(wow did spell check and sucky is NOT a word... since when?!) day I guess. Idk really. I was just really tired. I had to get up and excuse myself from science to walk around and wake up because I was soo tired and it was soo boring. That was my day.

over all life is swell. I think.

I'm being really evasive, indecisive, fickle and vague in everything I say. Sorry if that gets on your nerves :-X

P.S. Lits, I miss you.

Oawuch

Mon, 31 Oct 2005 22:24:17 GMT

I have a head ache. Happy Halloween. I was nothing .. for Halloween. because I wasn't. So I'm thinking about adutioning for the fall musical production. But I won't get a part teh matters.. so why does it matter? Think about that Sacrotes. So today was pretty amusing cause people dressed up. and yup thats it. i have a hell of a week coming up so ask em about it sometime... thanks for being my friend.

Emily, has 22 Lady Bugs and 1 Random Bug in her light.

End of Updation.

when commenting leave your nameee

Updation

Sun, 30 Oct 2005 19:28:11 GMT

.I'm Updating.

Yo necesito nuevos amigos.

NEW LAYOUT

Sat, 10 Sep 2005 15:50:11 GMT

Emily ROCKS for making me this sweet new layout. YAY!

-"World Peace"-

Sun, 24 Apr 2005 17:15:11 GMT

Spring Break was kind of nice. I got to think about a lot of things. The things I normally do not have time to think about, but always run threw my mind. For example, what is the purpose of living if death is waiting, how can creating things, such as a baby, or a lego castle, or the twin towers, take so much time, energy, and effort and only be made in one way when they can be destroyed so easy in so many different ways, or what does my future hold, and do I have any say in my own fate? These questions make me go insane, but then not knowing the answers is what keeps me sane. Weird. I don't know. Lately I fell like I am not really here, like everything around me is happening but for no reason. I fell so unimportant, so insignificant, so microscopic. And I'm realizing now how much innocence I don't have and how much I am losing(which really bothers me). I wonder if people care and actually want to know "how are you feeling?" I wish most people did. This world could be so great if people cared. And out of all of my flaws, my unsatisfaction is the one I loathe the most. I wish I could be satisfied with a B+ and my half ass school work, I wish I could stop beating myself up because "I'm not the Best." and I wish I could stop pushing myself to be someone I'm not. I am not Miss Perfection, and the sad thing is, is that I want to be. I want to inspire people to be better people. I want the change the world. "World Peace" "World Hunger" "AIDS" Everything that is wrong I want to make right, which is completely ridiculous and totally unreachable. I hate it. I set my goals so high, so out of this world, that I'm left with nothing, because I am too busy thinking about the impossible when possible is staring me right in the face. I wonder if anyone else thinks about "things" in general as much as I do. Seriously, sometimes I think I am legally insane because I think and worry and wonder about "things" that not even most grown-ups think/worry/wonder about. Like have you ever wonder if every reality show every made donated all of its earning and all the money that they put in to making that show to a good cause, like "World Peace" "World Hunger" "AIDS", How quickly could one of those problems be fixed? or even smaller problems such as gun control and gang bangs. Its like doesn't any one care people die every day for no reason, just because some one felt like it, or because they wanted revenge. Don't people want to change "things" to make them right? Don't people want to have a safer world for their children? And if the "don't care" then thats crazy. I do not understand how people can just not care about other people's life, or if anything, their own life. I just do not understand.

Alanis Morrissette

I'm broke but I'm happy
I'm poor but I'm kind
I'm short but I'm healthy
I'm high but I'm grounded
I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed
I'm lost but I'm hopeful
I feel drunk but I'm sober
I'm young and I'm underpaid
I'm tired but I'm working
I care but I'm restless
I'm here but I'm really gone
I'm wrong and I'm sorry
I'm free but I'm focused
I'm green but I'm wise
I'm hard but I'm friendly
I'm sad but I'm laughing
I'm brave but I'm chickenshit
I'm sick but I'm pretty

And what it all boils down to
Is that no one's really got it figured out just yet

Thanks for Listening.

Care.
--me

Ninner Time

Sat, 19 Mar 2005 23:44:10 GMT

Well I am at Ninner because she is bomb. stuff has gone on since my last entry. the end.
peace out home dog

I love alex + not you =)
because she rocks.
bye

BEMUSED

Tue, 08 Mar 2005 20:49:56 GMT

Okay now that my brain is currentlyl in 120947 different places, I don't even kno what I'm confused about.. I am jsut simply confused. nothing makes sense EVERYTHING is just one big huge cloud of gray.. and sad to say i am not seeing any silver lining... i jsut want to scream and let eberythign all out but i can't i'm too sad and iwant to cry but i'm too mad and i was to get over this all but i can't cause i'm soo confused that i'm a crossroads. i don't kno the difference between up and down and my right from my left. its liek my world has been turned upside down in the matter of one weekend. My brian is at school trying to work its hardest, my soul is trying to pull itself together from all the lose in my life, which i really didn't relize unitl this weekend. my heart is god knos where... i'm just sooo uncomfortable in my own skin, i don't kno wheather to laugh or cry, sing or scream, dance or lay still. and when i got on the bus today and we turned on to publishers parkway.. it was liek my death walk. and as i entered school i was afriad to look up. i can't see those sad faces any more. it kills me. and just raises my depression by a little more, by each face and lately i've been questioning my faith as disgusting as it sounds... I forgot what i believed in. I've stopped having faith. and sometimes i'm just at a lose of words when people ask me how I feel. phfff. i have kno idea.. its like "One moment please"......10 hours later..."Well you see, the average of all my feelings would be -Error-Error-Error-".. sajgdhavjodgsmdioloal! <thats how i feel. right there that describes it all. i'm soo numb.. just numb, i can't feel anything. cause i'm feeling to much. i can't think anythign, cause i'm thinking to much. its liek i can't even concentrate on sam when we are having a conversation.. and that really really scares me.. beyound belief. its liek i don't even want to blink any more cuase i'm afraid when i open my eyes again somethign will be different, somethign will have changed. I do Not want any more changes. i want my innocence back. i want to be sheltered from this pain... I want to see the light again...- -Impossible... ikno

time to update

Sat, 05 Mar 2005 17:33:31 GMT

Well this week was quiet pleasant I suppose.. I GOT A 100 ON MY PROJECT BIOTCHES! and a 93 on the test so I'm pretty pround of myself... no other exciting news other then I GOT IN TO ALL COUNTY MATH LEAGUE.. social sucide.. i kno, but it was soo cool and a whole different -zone- of smartness. I don't kno, I was really proud of myself and just another thing to put on my resume I guess.. marr this whole be the best and be your best has got my panties in a bunch.. its just a big blurry gray area for me, I see it as to be my best i haev to be the best... adn its gotten me all discombobulated and kinda depressed but not that bad its just something i gotta find.. if that made any sense.. well today is saturday and I GOT MY BLOOD DRAWN ahhh and now its tiem to do my job go to a movei with my dad , dinner mass with lisa and t and then BUEATY ADN THE BEAST with them also FUNNN!!!

shortness maybe
i love you all

--content Me
<3 SRG!!!

Time To Update.

Fri, 25 Feb 2005 16:59:50 GMT

So its been eleven days. shoot me. :-P let me fill you in well there was valentines day on the 14th that was fun, thank you t and eric for the flowers, then that was the week from hell were i got .09 hours of sleep and had elephants of homework. but i really got to "stay on top of my game" and then on friday i got in to school a little in to thrid block becuase i stayed up until one in the morning makkng my social studies project look really "Acient" ? maybe.. becuase that was part of the prject and when i come in to class and hand mr T my prject he goes " what did your cat pee on this or something?" exact quote aHHHHHHHHHHHH i was like last straw buddy (it was liek the cherry of my already fattening sundae That I DIDN'T ORDER) and i wanted to liek jump of all the desk and you kno in mean girl how shes liek i kno how i'd settle this in the real world and then every one starts fighting see that woudl have been key right there but ofcourse he hands me the test... no time to beat up teachers :-P haha JUST KIDDING so then i had a test but was completely distracted the whole time but that comment its liek i give it all i have and i get nothign but a sleezzey comment in return AHhhhhhhh yes and then alex came over and then she left and sam came over adn then saturday sunday monday and tuesday i have a temperuture of 103 yes 103 and i was constantly blowign my nose and i'm an not kidding i fell a sleep holding a tissue to my nose but i'm all better now thank god.. i think my body was yellling at me for doing to much school and not enough teraisa .. yea thats it, but besides being sick i still managed to go to the RPO with eric whcih was fun and really awesome, i love him like ahh he's great. and then on sunday i did a little geva!!!! cause i'm a play freak thats all. lets see so were at wednseday and it was my birthday rahh rahh i'm 15 rahh rahh i got a cd player and earings... rahhh rahhh? marrr can't have everything and lately i have been liek feeling guilty to be able to buy things and actually having some money to spend and that i'm not liek porr of my ass not sayign thats a bad thign at all but i don't kno where i'm supposed to hide it or embrace it marr leave comments? sooo thursdaysam came over and we did .. nothing actually ahh i love him and i'm not trying to liek over expand and be lan obessive girlfriend but its jsut great to have such wonderful loving caring people in my life. i thank thee :-P and then i went to T's! with Emilia and watched Mean Girls ha. love that movie, okay soo today is friday woot woooo going to ferdonia.. a college... to be with my sissy poo poo for the weekend. yay excited yes aphensive yes... english word wooot.

okay i'm gonna stop now with my long life story and my typing sound effects.

makinitonmyown23: youre a loser
tHe EnD XoxX: duh.
^ wow i love her

--in my place :-) Me
<3 SRG

Ps. Pray for that little girl who got kiddnapped in Florida, she needs it.
LOVE
love

I'm not a girl... Not yet a women.

Sun, 13 Feb 2005 20:15:16 GMT

I guess "highschool years" are exactly what every one says they are, the years to "find the real you" make your "own path" and find where you "fit it"
A) I'm not sure i want to kno the "real me".. i'm kinda sastified with who i am right now...partly
B) Its kinda hard to build your "own path" when you have a forrest infront of you and a nail fial.
C) I'm classified as sam's girlfriend or a nerd.. idk anymore, the more days go by the futhure away i feel from my closest friends...

short ness i kno.. but i got up at 10 and it is now 3 and i haven't done a thing so its crunch time for the next 3 hours.. yay?

and FYI love doesn't make the word go round, hate does. beucase if it wasn't for hate, love wouldn't seem so perfect.

that's all.

^ see T i made up my own saying :-P <luv ya! --Out.of.Place Me, <3sRg:-D P.S. It takes three times as much energy to frown then to smile. Think about it. love LOVE

PMS- READ COMPLETELY!!

Tue, 08 Feb 2005 21:04:11 GMT

Okay i am offically pissed. and this doesn't happen quiet often, usually its a build up of "stuff" that bugs me and bugs me and keeps on bugging me!... i don't get people! and please do not take this personally AT ALL, it is just a couple events from liek 3108329 defferent people, so I AM NOT MAD AT ANY ONE! i'm just fustrated with me and sam's relationship and then OTHER PEOPLE. see there is me, sam, other people. other people and me. other people and sam, but there is not and never will be ME, SAM AND OTHER PEOPLE. its just annoying to have liek 019273902 people come up to me and liek hey i'm going to annoy you, even though i usually won't if you weren't with sam, blahh blahh blahh, harass harass. for liek the negative 18273 seconds i see sam in school. and i'm not saying me and sam can't chill with other people, NOT AT ALL. its just when people are liek OHH KISSY KISSY its liek dude!!!! i don't do that to you when your wiht you girl/boyfriend so back the funker off.:-P i am not trying to be rude at all and i love every one and i'm not mad at anyone, but how am i supposed to tell "people" it bothers me adn to please stop without sounding liek a bitch girlfriend who is excluding all her friends when with sam.. its liek a lose lose situation! >:0 if you have any advice please leave comments caus ei am liek going crazzzzzy in school... and if you are reading this and see me in the halls tomrrow when walking with sam pleeeease don't go run and cover thinking you are annoying me beucase thats NOT IT AT ALL. cuase believe me i want to talk to you as much as i do to sam or any one else for that matter .(if not more) and if you think i'm directing this towards you, which i'm not. I'm NOT MAD, but you can leave a comment and we can chat.. civilized.. with out me liek pernoucing to the world that i can't find a solution to my OWN problem.

.tHe-eNd.

^sry T i had to :-P <i love you t! --Fustrated Me <3sRg

Looks Like We Made It :-)

Thu, 27 Jan 2005 21:50:06 GMT

So I skipped school wednesday... boo-hoo, Math A testing wasn't that bad at all. I think I did pretty well. And I'm not going to GORE with ALEX anymore :-( :-( cause english essays SUCK! but thats okay.. my daddy always said work before play.. mehh, oh yea new word Marr- cause every one stole mehh. what to talk about... school sucks, what else is new? haha I took a Social Studies test today, ha. that was a JOKE!ha. ahhh I skipped lunch today cause I told sam i wasnt' going to eat breakfast or lunch... and when I was taking my science test my stomache was like GROOOOGOROOOORGROGOROGROOGROOGLLLL... it was great. I think me and sam got in to our first offical fight. ha. that was a JOKE too. it was a block long. the end. its kinda funny cause we have nothing to fight about, so everything all swell :-D oh and the play is going quiet well, minus the fact that I am the worst singer there, but it'll get better in time? :-X ha.
Well things I have to do this weekend:
- go to Lisa's play, ANNIE :-)
- finish English Essay :-(
- wish that I was with ALEX at GORE :-/

mmaaaarrrrr....

I try not to over book myself.:-P

well its a thursday, more intellectual talk later :-D

Shit happens. Wear diapers.

--me
<3sRg *my.heart.beats.for.you*

So this is what you call HighSchoool?

Sun, 23 Jan 2005 18:45:02 GMT

mehh... its a sunday so now i have to make up for all the stuff i didn't do on saturday.. mehh, well i have an english paper to write (which really isn't that bad i just have to "do it") and a math A test to study for even though math is easier then picking my nose... atleast for me, but studying couldn't hurt soo yea.. i already have eatten, showered, gotten ready, and cleaned my room(-minus vacuming :-) cause i'm lazy) and its 1:30 so i'd say i'm doing pretty well- this week coming up kinda seems like a draaaaaaaag cause we skip over an odd day which is my favorite day... stupid superentdent person... but whatever .. i get to go to GORE with ALEX this weekend to SKI .. more like fall on my ass every three minutes and watch alex laugh at me but its better then sitting on my ass around here doign NO-ting :-)
i got another poem, not too exciting but enjoy...

The sun shines like your smile, but not as bright.
The moon glows like your eyes, but yours see more light.

The birds sing like the sound of your voice, but no as beautifully.
The rain falls like my love for you, but not as much.

The rainbow never ends like my trust in you, but not as far.
The world keeps spinning just like my heart beating, but not as fast.

The roses smell like you, but not as sweet.
The grass grows like my love for you, but not as green.

well I have things to do, leave comments(and suggest titles for these poems cause i got NO-thing.)

Forgive AND Forget.
and don't be rude :-)

Love you all.
--Me

<3sRg

...The REAL beginging of the New Year.

Tue, 18 Jan 2005 23:31:58 GMT

this is the time in which i rewind, pause, breathe for a second, play, watched how i completly messed up soo many things, and then put it back on record, a little start over... those bumps in the road seem to get more difficult to get around everytime the "pop" up. but it "looks" like easy travels .. atleast for a while and i apologize for any time that i have promised i woudl chill with you and came up short i ahev been ... procastinating, being lazy, and queit busy, but i will promise we will chill soon, and leave a comment if you are one of those people. and I jsut wnat to say thank you to every oen who has helped me in that past couple of days. well recently my sister is leaving for college..again.. liek we even said two words to eachother...:-/ my parents.. are parents. my friends are amazing people and i am blessed with every signle one of them... my gades coudl be better.. alot better.. as always but whatever, always next quarter right?... and me wise.. i'm satified i guess.. kinda living day by day ya kno?
well i got more work to do then a sack of patatoes ...( i'm goign to think that made sense)

Sorry for not updating for soo long.

poem by me that doesn't ryhme.. ehh i try

Its just you and me
No one else needs to see
You lift me up on Eagle’s wings
Like I’m flying above everything

My world is whole when
I look into your eyes.
And my walls are let down.
You can see me cry.

You are my soul mate
And this will last for ever
Because I can not sleep without you
And every girl needs her rest.

We will be friends for ever
And lovers until death
I will never let you go
Because you hold my heart in your other hand

peace. love life. its short.

--Teraisa
<3sRg

..exhusated...

Wed, 05 Jan 2005 03:19:27 GMT

Well this is gonna be a quick one ;-) i have a shower to attend and a bed time to make... but life great and dandy -MINUS school. but whatever. The play is SO kool. ILoveIt! hmmm idk not much to write..well its late and by this time of the day my thougths come feew at a time with long pauses inbetween.

Help Eachother, it makes you feel Good!

Word of the day - palatable - please to the palate or to taste. :-) AWESOME!

Life's a Box of Chocolates... ya Never kno whatcha ya gonna get.

gotta love that Forrest Gump!

--Me
<3SG -lets disappear-

...Looks Like A Long Week-

Tue, 04 Jan 2005 02:30:41 GMT

Well I had a good case of the mondays! .. actually i didn't even have a case of the mondays.. i woke up @ SIX, which I haven't done for about.. EVER! & I ATE BREAKFAST like .. before !8!.. that is amazing for me. I love sticking to this whole resolution thing.. or maybe I relized I have more of a reason to actually "get up" in the morning.. well whatever it is.. its working.
First Day Of The Play! EXCITING! like ahh i can't even describe how bad i am looking forward to "do this" and then the showsssss.. ahh just thinking about it makes me.. get nervous.. but a good nervous.. :-) I think today I relize what amazing life "us folk" live.. and how many amazingly awesome out of this world best friends I have. idk... things are looking up, actually things are up! and i dislike the saying what goes up must come down.. it worries me... :-/

well i have hmwk thats not due until wendseday to do... (ikno doing hmwk..liek before the bell.. amazing how this works) and a bed timem to make! :-D

I Love You!

word fo the day - chary- to be causious or worrisome

Life's a Garden- DIG IT!

--me
<3SG .lovely.

What a B-e-a-uuutiful way to the the New Year!

Sun, 02 Jan 2005 18:58:41 GMT

I must say I am thrilled for this year! and the play starts TOMORROW!... even though I will be totally clueless and ... yea clueless, that sums that up. Let's just say last night was the best way to strat the new year. :-D You kno in the movies how women always get weak in the knees or they start to shake and they can't hold themselves up and thats how they kno they're in love, well that happened to me last night, annoying as it was - its was kinda nice to kno its not just my heart thats crazy its my whole body :-P and I'm really starting to wonder if you can never be too young to fall in love... I mean I'm not saying me and sam are getting married tomorrow.. but what i don't get is why are people soo against young love, yea it may not last, but why not embrace while you still have it. Any ideas? Leave comments.
I think I'm doing well on my "stay to the resolutions" theory - minus the fact the i didn't go to bed unitl 1:30 last night but thats just because there was a really good show on..? excuses excuses teraisa, i kno i kno. ehh its a work in progress.
>Well my mom bought me this word-a-day calendar so I decided I would use them in my Journal..
yesterday's word was - evergreen... The trees that stay green all year are evergreens. :-)
today's word was - tantivy... The childern tantivy ran away from the big scary ghost.
^See I am e x p a n d i n g my vocabulary and i hope you are too.:-)

Well today I plan on doing my job, doing my MATH HOMEWORK (don't kno what thats all about) dinner.. and then CrossRoads to caught up with my PEOPLE!!:-)

Have Fun Being You.

--me
<3SG

p.s. i'm not to young to be in love.

Good Night 2004 - Good Morning 2005

Sat, 01 Jan 2005 18:41:21 GMT

Well good morning world... more like afternoon. Before i actually start this thing i must apoligize for my typing/spelling... its a work in progress. Happy New Year to you all... another year gone by, its seems as i get older the years go by so much faster, its almost scary. But i am completely excited for this year. And as weird as this sounds i can't wait to get back to school... not to jump in to homework !yay! but to start the play.. ahh one of my dreams is coming true (thank you Emily Putnam) but anyways i started this "journal" so old man can stack me online... wow just kidding.. i wanted to keep track of my "oh so interesting" life and keep "you" informed as well. becuase i have a feeling i'm going to be very busy this year?... but busy is good.. busy means no useless hours watching tv, eatting food, getting fat, and then passing out.. as fun as that sounds.. well i want to write down my new year resolutions cause i kno i will forget them...
1) Stay true to myself, my family, my frineds, my lover, and my morals.
2) Stay healthy and in shape (i kno, predictable, but hey everyone could lose a couple pounds? :-P
3) To STOP PROCASTINATING (which will be the death of me)
...well its a start

i hope this was as good for you as it was for me... ;-) but i'm off to start the new year with... The Used.. YAY chat later

--ME
<3SG

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